


Memory Isn't All We Are

by Trashcanakin



Series: Trash's 2019 Bingo fills [1]
Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Car Accidents, Don't copy to another site, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Memory Loss, Steve Rogers Is a Good Bro, Temporary Amnesia, tbh idk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-19
Updated: 2019-07-19
Packaged: 2020-07-08 16:56:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19872952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trashcanakin/pseuds/Trashcanakin
Summary: After the accident, Bucky couldn't remember anything about the life he had. People would tell him things if he'd asked, but there were no memories that followed, just facts and feelings. But feelings are tricky things, Bucky discovered.Then there was Tony Stark, a man he couldn't remember, but knew he loved.Is it possible to fall for the same man twice?





	Memory Isn't All We Are

**Author's Note:**

> Made for TSB: T2 - Reunion & BBB: C4 - Winteriron (Bucky/Tony) & WIB: O4 - Temporary Amnesia
> 
> \---
> 
> This was written in a weird style...but it's all the energy I have to offer (it was supposta be a short blurb anyways, lmao whoops) 
> 
> Not beta'd, sorry for mistakes.

Though Tony and Bucky were married, Steve was Bucky's emergency contact, due to the fact that Tony was busy often. All three of them were in agreement on it; Tony didn't want anything to go wrong and him being unavailable to take a call, so they arranged it that way.

Neither of them ever expected it would be needed, but life has a way of throwing curveballs like that. Life is never perfect and it isn't fair.

When Steve got the phone call, his entire body froze; he didn't want to believe what he'd heard. Bucky had been in a terrible accident. Someone had fallen asleep at the wheel and swerved into the oncoming lane hitting another car. It caused a pile up. Bucky'd been on his bike, and when a car crashed into him it threw him off the bridge they were on. He was lucky to be alive.

Steve was in shock, but got to the hospital as fast as he could. Bucky was in surgery when he'd arrived and he tried multiple times to contact Tony.

When Tony finally answered, Steve told him what had happened. Hearing the panic, fear, and pain in Tony's voice was something Steve wishes he could forget.

Tony and Bucky were his two best friends and this was the worst thing he could imagine for either of them.

Tony was away on business in another country, but he cancelled and was immediately on his way.

It took him seven and a half hours to arrive.

Surprisingly, Bucky had woken up an hour before.

\---

"Tony, he doesn't remember you, he doesn't remember any of us...anything. I know you love him, but," Steve trailed off with a pained expression; "Just take it slow, yeah? He...he wasn't taking it very well."

"Yes, anything, I won't push, promise," Tony uttered, trying hard to swallow the bile down that was rising in his chest.

Steve could tell the other man was boiling over with anxiety, Tony was practically vibrating in his skin. He understood fully well how Tony was feeling.

His gaze followed Tony as he watched the man disappear into the hospital room, blinking back the tears he tried to hide.

He wanted to be strong for them, but it was hard.

He cried when no one was looking.

\---

When Tony walked into Bucky's room that first night, he spoke calmly, didn't ask too many questions other than the usual "how are you feeling?" and "do you need anything?" He never mentioned their marriage, didn't push or pressure Bucky into remembering anything.

He wanted so desperately to kiss him, but he didn't.

He left Bucky's room that night, but never left the hospital.

Steve and Tony took turns keeping Bucky company, when the man felt up to it. They didn't want to crowd or overwhelm him.

\---

It had been a week since then, since that first painful night in the hospital. Tony had visited every day and stayed a few nights when Bucky said he didn't mind.

Bucky still couldn't remember anything, but he liked Tony. Something deep in his chest pulled towards the other man, but he couldn't place it.

He still didn't know they were married.

But he was piecing things together. He had no memory of anything to go off, but he wasn't stupid. Head injury or not, he could see the way Tony looked at him; could tell that it was a different look than the one's Steve and Sam sent him.

Where Steve, Sam, and the one time Rhodey visited looked at him with hidden pain and friendliness, Tony's eyes were always gentle, full of sadness, but also _longing_.

Friends didn't look at each other like that.

One night he would gather the courage to ask.

\---

"I can't remember, Steve...but I know him. I feel it, here," Bucky stated with certainty, gently rubbing a hand over his chest. "It hurts, but I can't stop thinkin' about him."

"You'll get them back, Buck, I know it; and Tony...he'll be here if you need him, always," Steve said, clutching Bucky's hand.

"Yeah...I get the feeling he will," Bucky stated, turning his head to gaze out the window. He was getting sick of the view.

\---

"We're...we're married," Tony replied, unable to look him in the eyes. His hands were closed around one of Bucky's.

Bucky could see the pain in Tony's gaze, and he hated it. He wanted nothing more than to wipe that look away and see the man smile again.

Tony hadn't smiled often, not with his eyes, anyways.

He was so patient with him.

Bucky was staring at their entwined hands and his lips cocked into a small smile, "Then where's your ring, doll?"

Tony huffed a small laugh, "Didn't want to freak you out."

They shared a smile. Tony's eyes were filled with warmth and love, despite the tears forming in them, threatening to drop.

One did.

Bucky reached up and wiped it away with a shaky hand.

"I'm sorry," Tony mumbled, clenching his eyes closed to try and shake away any more tears that threatened to crush his resolve.

"Don't be," Bucky uttered back.

\---

Bucky started having vivid dreams then, but he didn't talk about them with anyone. He didn't want to give false hope to himself or anyone else. Dreams didn't mean anything, he never believed that.

He mostly dreamt of Tony.

He wondered if it was possible to fall in love with the same person twice.

\---

Now that Bucky knew they were together, though he had no memory of it, Tony started bringing some of Bucky's things; not many as he still was afraid to overwhelm him, but a few things that maybe could help him feel more at home. If someone who couldn't remember what home was, could feel more of it.

He also brought Bucky's journals so the man could read them if he wanted. Bucky recognized his handwriting, he knew they were his.

He read them.

He realized that his dreams weren't dreams, they were memories.

He wished they meant more.

\---

"I'm happy you visit me every day, Tony. You're definitely the best view in the room."

"Are you flirting with me, Mr. barnes?" Tony quipped, smirking at the other man.

"Am I not allowed?" Bucky grinned back.

\---

"I won't be able to come by tonight, peaches, Pepper is about to have my head if I skip any more meetings; but Steve will be here."

"That's alright, doll."

\---

"I think I love him," Bucky announced as Steve walked into the room.

"What?" Steve asked, brows raising.

"Tony," he replied, "I know I can't really remember our life together, but I know _him._ He's perfect, Steve, and I doubt I could get through any of this if he weren't here," he sighed.

Steve couldn't stop his smile from spreading, warm with affection. He watched his two idiot friends fall in love once already, he'd be happy to survive it again. Even if Bucky never regained any of his memories, he was undoubtedly falling for Tony a second time. And if he had to stand up and give his best man speech a second time, well, he would do it with honor.

Bucky still hadn't told them about the dreams.

\---

It had been three weeks since the accident.

Tony brought more of Bucky's things, _their_ things.

This time he brought a photo album.

"You don't have to look at it, if it'll be too hard...but it's here, if you want to," Tony said, setting the album down on Bucky's bedside table. "I'll be back in the morning," Tony said with a small smile before turning to leave.

"Alright. Thank you," Bucky replied, watching the man exit the room.

\---

He looked at them.

And wept.

\---

When morning came, Bucky woke to Steve sitting in one of the chairs in his room. It was around six am, still slightly dark outside. Bucky didn't know, but Steve told him once that he was always out that early and not to worry over it; so he offered a smile.

Steve beamed back.

An hour later Tony arrived, just like he'd said.

\---

Bucky was left alone that night. His injuries were healing up well, and both Steve and Tony were busy. They tried canceling, but Bucky scoffed at them and said not to ruin all their plans just because he was sleeping at a hospital.

He looked through the album again.

He read this journals again.

He fell asleep with a smile.

\---

"Good morning, Buck!" Steve announced when he walked in.

"Mornin' punk," Bucky said back, lips cocked into a smirk.

Steve froze, staring back at Bucky with wide eyes.

"Buck?" Steve asked, hopeful.

"Yeah, Stevie, it's me."

Steve was about to shriek his excitement, but Tony walked into the room before he could, nearly hitting Steve with the door. The utter joy on Steve's face didn't miss him, though.

"What's got such a pep in your magnificent step, huh, Capcicle?" Tony questioned, huffing a laugh.

Steve couldn't form any words, just standing there with a big grin and watering eyes. He looked back at Bucky and whispered, "Oh my God. Oh my God!"

Tony's face scrunched in confusion. Staring at Steve was giving him no answers, so he looked over at Bucky too.

Bucky was gazing at him with so much affection it made him feel weak. He felt his heart speed up and he wasn't even sure why.

"C'mere, Starshine," Bucky said, face transformed with an adoring smile.

Tony hurried over to the bed, sitting on the edge. Bucky wasted no time pulling him in for a kiss. When they broke apart, finally, they were both crying; Bucky rested their foreheads together and let out a sigh.

"I missed you," he said, twining his fingers through Tony's.

"I don't see how you could miss him, he was here every day," Steve muttered, lightheartedly. It came out in a hitch of breath. Steve was crying too.

"C'mere, punk," he smirked at Steve.

They all shared a hug.

Everything was fine.


End file.
